At 63, I have indulged in at least a large number of the possible ways to do just that. I have lusted after having things that in the end I really did not need and it cost me dearly in wasted time to acquire them. I have chosen to take the wrong road, only to find out that wasn't where I wanted to go at all. I have struggled to fit into groups which had no interest in including me. Worse yet, I just got lost in my life for long periods and just allowed myself to drift wherever the stream chose to take me. And then there were the years I allowed myself to sink into depression, during which I could move neither forward or backwards. The best I could do was go get through the day in one piece, from one day to the next. But such as it was, it was my life and I take full responsibility for the times when I failed and the times when I sailed successfully.
As a nation, we have collectively gone through one of the most traumatic years, economically.
But most of us have survived the crunch and are gearing up to move on once again with our lives. Talk about living in limbo for a year, 2009 was real pip. We all stood back waiting for what shock to our lives would come next. We all lost a lot of time to anxiety and fear and uncertainty as to what was to come next.
Upon reflection, we might all emerge from the disaster that was 2009 with an amazing opportunity. I, for one, have rethought my life. So many of the things I wanted to have or to be just do not seem all that important anymore. The big house, the fancy car, the big screen television, belonging to the posh country club, most certainly a lot of money in the bank... all those things are nice to have. But ultimately, they are just things, just things that impart a transitory bit of status to us.
My business was badly impacted by the downturn, and I am rebuilding it in earnest now. There are times when money is very short or for a day or two, my bank account is completely tapped. But I found out something very important. I need food on the table and gas in the car. I need a roof over my head and money enough to pay the bills. I need clothes on my back and I need to be able to see a doctor if there is I experience a health issue. These things I absolutely need and if I do have them, then I will make it and my life will go on, not hugely impacted by the shortfall.
I will tell you what really matters. When I come home, there will be people who care about me and who love me, in spite of all my failings. I enjoy a rich family life. I can tap into a network of friends who will be there for me and for whom I will be there. I haven't destroyed my reputation or my health. And even if I do not have a great deal of money, I enjoy the sense that I am making a difference in the world... that in that regard, I am one of the richest men in the world.
In the final analysis, it really doesn't matter what others have that I do not have. I doesn't matter that others enjoy more fame or fortune than I do. Nor does it matter that the professional or academic accomplishments of some men and women outshine mine. Such things can be easily tarnished or taken from you anyway. There are no guarantees in our lives that anything lasts forever.
I have no idea if there are going to be another tomorrow for me. No matter if there is or there isn't, I am just thankful that I have made it this far. It is certainly enough that I am so blessed as to possess the things that really matter.
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